Review by Alex on April 14, 2020.

Coming from Finland is a mayhemic, loud an battering form of thrash and black metal; total annoyance, total anarchy. Seemingly sloppy at times as if half the band is playing one thing and the other half has their own parliament going on; not for those of you who are looking for some kind of decency in music. Templar sounds like they really don't give a damn about anyone or anything; no cares for any of that hippie analytical shit like coordination or timing and flow, they're just doing them.

The music (hahaha "music") on their debut demo is destructive and barbarian yet there are some moments to be highlighted like the riffing on 'Templaric 女武侠' and 'Flaming Metal Supremacy' that in contrast to the ruckus of a production, delivers on some six-stringed delight. And in a manner of adding some amusement to the intentional clatter, Templar's vocalist appears to have an excessive liking for the 'ooh', so much that its used in teasing and joking ways often.

Oh there's more, the way this guy screams is lawless, a real commonplace style of vocals. Those attempts at accented yells combined with the gibberish-like vocals and the messy production and musicianship makes for a listen that you can't help but laugh. Favorite tracks? 'Flaming Metal Supremacy', 'War Lesbians' and 'Renegade Templar of the Radiating Deserts', I think those are the most entertaining of the bunch perhaps due to the way they mock all things music; though I would say the twin guitar solo did ironically show some competence. It's only 18 minutes in duration, yea it's a short stretch during the hurdle towards the finish line but its too comical to not find some amusement and laughter in.

A brilliant cluster-fuck of drumming, riffing and chirks or weird attempts at King Diamond screams, yet a comedy of errors never sounded so damn essential. Knights of Nuclear Hell Decibelfucking the Charred Remains of the Christ is probably what metal in its primitive, naked form sounded like before being clothed and matured. Highly recommended for cavemen and people that have been practicing social distancing long before COVID-19.

Rating: 7 out of 10

Review by Adam M on September 23, 2017.

Cradle of Filth brings a very bombastic element to their music. This is theatrical music that has the flair that is necessary to impress the listener. Though the band’s sound hasn’t changed much over the years, it is nice to hear it as vibrant and enthusiastic as it is here. The music is certainly very interesting with a lot of instruments used and Dani Filth’s vocal tirade atop it all. The band has certainly found their muse and a formula that works for them.

The music here is memorable, but really has more of an impact right out of the gates. The entertainment factor is on high throughout the length of this release and it shows very heavily in the tunes found here. The listener will be head banging along with the tracks and it’s very nice to hear this band performing as passionately as they are. There is a serious amount of fun that the band is having and it bleeds into their performances quite nicely. The songs flow into one another and make for a cohesive whole also. Really, most of the pieces come together. It’s just that this is music that Cradle of Filth has performed before and they were never the most compelling band on the block to begin with. Expect music similar to past albums and if one is a fan of the past this will definitely work in their favor.  

People who never gave this band a chance in the past will have to skip this one once again as there is nothing incredibly original on display here. Still, for fans of the band, the best foot has been put forward and the result is another solid slab of symphonic black metal that has a very accessible flair to it. Cradle of Filth have stumbled upon a winner with Cryptoriana.

Rating: 7.6 out of 10